Lately, I’ve been hearing more and more that parent interactions are one of the biggest pain points for coaches. It’s concerning to think that some, especially younger coaches, are leaving the profession because they dread dealing with parents. I understand this challenge; as a young coach, I also struggled to stay on the same page with parents. Over time, though, I’ve learned that the key to positive parent interactions is treating them as partners. That partnership starts with clear, consistent communication.
Before the start of the season, I encourage coaches to decide what role they want parents to play on their team. Maybe the coach wants parents to drop their child off at practice and leave, or maybe they’d like parents to stay and help run a station. On game day, the coach might want parents to support the team by cheering only, or they might want them to provide water and snacks. Whatever the coach decides, it’s up to them to communicate parent expectations at the beginning of the season. Parents are busy and want to be helpful. Don’t make them guess what’s expected. Also, at different age levels, parent support looks and feels different, so parents who are new to the team will need guidance on what is appropriate. Make parents feel welcome and included on the team.
After the first practice, or during the first week of practice, I strongly suggest hosting a parent meeting. This gives parents a chance to meet the coach and one another, and it starts building the adult community. The parent meeting is the time to introduce your coaching philosophy, outline plans for the season, and set parent expectations. Any communication coaches can do at the beginning of the season helps avoid confusion and limits issues as the season progresses. Pro tip: Pre-schedule an email with all of the information from the meeting to be sent to parents afterward, so they also have the information in writing. This way, they can refer back to it if they have questions.
In our busy, technology-filled world, most parent communication can be done through email or text. However, I’ve found that there are times when a phone call or a quick chat after practice works best. Use email and texting for logistics, dates, times, and locations of games and practices. But conversations about safety concerns, injuries, or player development (including playing time) should always be handled by phone or in person, so tone and intent don’t get lost. Pro tip: If an email or text chain goes back and forth more than twice, pick up the phone or schedule a time to talk. It’s much faster to find alignment when talking directly.
When partnering with parents, communicating early and often is the foundation for building trust. Coaches also need to remember that sometimes parents are in the best position to make decisions for their child, even when those decisions differ from what the coach recommends. At the end of the day, both coaches and parents share the same goal: for the child to have a positive experience and learn from being part of a team. Keeping that common goal at the forefront of every interaction helps maintain perspective. When coaches and parents trust each other and stay informed about the child’s needs, it creates a positive experience for everyone involved.
